Lately i have been trying to figure out what i would put on my blog what i would take off. what names i would say, what names i wouldn't. i have decided one thing. this blog is going to be used to talk about where I'm in my life. so read at your own risk :)
I have four days until i leave for africa. i'm so excited but i'm scared at the same time. i know that i'm going to see the incredible, but i also know that that will come with a price, emotionally, physically, income etc.
i thought i had all the money together for the trip but then the other night i realized i didn't even have enough money to pay for a 15 dollar ticket to the Vancouver, let alone two nights in africa (i will be arriving before the rest of the team) i send a very dear friend a message asking for prayer and explaining what was happening, to which they responded i want to bless you with a sum of money, this isn't the first time this has happened and i'm so blessed to know that god is watching out for me. but at the same time its hard for me to not feel guilty, did i save enough before was i careful how i spent my money. i'm worried about when i get back, will my money that is tied up in shared investments ever see the light of day? hopefully when i get back so i can start my life in canada (home, food, rent, good job, etc). these are just a few of the stresses in my life so i really need prayer!
i have been pulled and stretched so much in the last few months, my body physically hurts from it but at the same time i know its god preparing me.
on thursday i went to my last youth group until i return to canada. i arrived and was quickly met by my youth pastor Evan, who asked if i would be willing to get up and share my heart. to which i responded yes before i could think about it. he told me he was speaking on prayer so i got up and shared my heart about prayer. I told 80 youth about how god had used prayer in my life. then Evan asked us to break off and pray, i stood in the corner because after getting off the stage i realized i had more that i forgot to say. one of the other leaders came over to me and we began to pray. my friend beside me began to break down crying. and then he told me how he had never cried well praying like that. i informed him that it was because his prayers were what god wanted, and because his heart was on the same page as gods he was seeing a glimpse of gods splendor. little did i know i was about to experience this. after we prayed Evan asked me to come back up and all 80+/- kids got up and laid hands on me and prayed for me. i had never been surrounded by so many praying for a common goal: that i would meet god and be protected. i could feel the tears in my eyes as i saw gods heart for my life for me to go to africa and pour my heart out there.
so here I'm. i'm 21 years old, my names Joel Peter Yager. i'm a born again, baptized christian, being launched for the second time into a world that is completely different then what i ever thought i wanted to be a part of. i love it! and i hate it, and i'm sad by it and i'm scared.
when I'm in Africa I'm going to be doing what ever god puts before me. once i leave for this trip i will have no money in my account, and I'm believing and knowing that god is going to supply for what ever need i have.
to those that read my blog, thanks, please pray for me, and know that this is my heart that i'm pouring out. like it or hate it, its Joel.
